Parting Shot: The Hustler In Chief

Obama_limo

Here’s Obama, hard at work, seat belt-less, trying to save his presidency since the health care bill no longer has anything do with health care.

Photo: Pete Souza/White House

Court Will Decide If Extremely Hateful Speech Is Constitutional

By now, you’ve probably heard about Westboro Baptist Church, they’re the extremist church group who believes God is punishing the U.S. for its toleration of homosexuality and anytime, anything bad happens to America, it stems from this. They’re also the deranged devotees who showed up at a cemetery during a funeral for a soldier killed in Iraq, holding signs that read: “Thank God for dead soldiers” and “Fag troops” among other pretty hateful messages. The church members weren’t inferring this particular solider was gay, they just decided to target his funeral, prompting the man’s father to sue the group. He won, but that decision was overturned and so now, the Supreme Court will determine whether it’s protected speech or not. My guess is, that despite the repugnant nature of it, it is. |LAT|

The Runaways: Chaos Made Cuddly

As, while trying to buy a knish, I got nearly trampled by little kids near the Landmark Sunshine the other day, I’ll partially plug SXSW’s musical fluff The Runaways. Rules for teeny bopper success are as follows: Read more »

Music Producer Clams He’s the Wizard Behind Lady Gaga’s Oz

Rob Fusari wants his 20 percent. The no name music producer is suing Stefani Germanotta for $30.5 million (cause $30 mill clearly wasn’t enough), claiming he co-wrote some of her biggest hits, gave her the name Lady Gaga, and helped her morph into the pop cultural phenomena she’s become. According to the lawsuit, they shared both a business and personal relationship, which is probably where he went wrong in the first place. Read more »

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Back When Freestyles Were ‘Free’ of ‘Style’

A rapper you’ve likely heard of, Big Daddy Kane, explains the definition of a “freestyle” in the 80s. He says, “When we said we wrote a freestyle rap, that means it was a rhyme that you wrote that was ‘free’ of ’style” meaning its not a subject matter…it’s basically a rhyme just bragging about yourself.” Nowadays of course, it’s mostly used when rappers recite written lyrics over instrumentals. |Nah Right|

Glow In the Dark Sperm Helps Scientists

Intently voyeuristic researchers came up with idea of “genetically altering fruit flies so that the heads of their sperm were fluorescent green or red” allowing them to get a better look at slutty wildlife and evolution: Read more »

Help “Chatroulette solve its penis problem.” Word, do it for the money and the greater good. |Business Insider|

Record Estimate for Picasso’s Absinthe Sipper, Also: Drinking Talk

Christie’s highest European pre-auction estimate is $45-$60 million for Pablo Picasso’s Blue Period portrait of party-boy artist Angel Fernandez de Soto visiting the Green Fairy. Disputed as Nazi loot, the 1903 Picasso brings up the subject of absinthe at Washington Post.

Absinthe is “falsely subversive” and “uncool” as of 2009 according to NYT (along with lower back tattoos and Interpol). The olde-turned-new trend has passed, friends (Mansinthe, anyone?). Read more »

Art Handling Olympics: Let the Games Begin, Let the Booze Follow

Sunday! Sunday! Sunday! Come cheer and jeer at the Art Handling Olympics at Ramiken and celebrate the local Atlases of the galleries as they screw, straighten and race for the win. Fifteen art handler teams compete for the gold with craftiness and tenacity, rain or shine. Read more »

NYC’s Junkies Will Have To Go Back To Shooting Up the Old Fashioned Way

Oh lawd! What are area heroins users going to do now that the City Council has effectively forced the Department of Health to agree to stop publishing the unnecessarily controversial heroin safety pamphlet? Apart from the prevailing apprentice tradition, I guess the internet savvy ones could always look it up online, but hopefully, the streets aren’t overridden with forehead-poked junkies and discarded burnt forks. |NYP|