By Amy Blair
I have a very, deep, dark, disturbing secret that usually seriously surprises people and occasionally freaks people out. And, well, because this is the internet, and revealing deep, dark, personal secrets seems to be considered â€œcoolâ€ in these fiery pits of nerdom, Iâ€™m going to go ahead and divulge it. Ok. Here goesâ€¦
â€¦I donâ€™t eat meat. (I know! The shame! The horror! The humiliation!).
Havenâ€™t touched the stuff in nineteen years. And since I completely stopped eating it when I was a mere finicky lass of ten-years old, I have hardly tried anything of the meaty variety beyond chicken nuggets, hot dogs and hamburgers (the things that little kids eat).
Iâ€™ve never had a steak. Iâ€™ve never had fish. Iâ€™ve never had chicken in any form other than the nugget. I have tried turkey and bacon, but found them to be, what I probably termed then, gag-me-with-a-spoon grody.
Yes, the rest of my family eats meat (in copious proportions). No, Iâ€™m not a member of PETA. Yes, I wear leather, and no, I donâ€™t feel bad when I eat fruits and vegetables even though they were ripped from their happy homes upon the vines and stalks from which they grew. Yes, Iâ€™m a terrible hypocrite and should probably be summarily shot.
Oh, and yes, if I were stranded on a desert island on the verge of starvation, yes, I would eat your dead ass.
Okee dokee. Moving on. Craigslist.
Got Herpes? Are You an Ex Slut/Porn Star?Can you groove to SATAN – 37
I am 37
No kids,Athletic build
No Drama,well employed Whip Smart.Dark Features
Diabolical,Dominant and Very Talented in many ways
I am Not fat or Bald
I am seeking Satanic/PAGAN/VEGAN/RASTA/WICCAN/PORNO SLUT FROM Heaven or HEll
You should love film ,art ,music and being sexcually dominated by aomeone who is looking for a long term relationship with a twisted little deviant slut.
This is not a joke…if you are a vegean/vegetarian that ia a huge plus.
Your Master is waiting
Some people are just too damn picky! Come on now, she has to be an ex-porn star, have herpes, groove to Satan, practice Rastafarianism AND be a vegetarian?! Youâ€™ll never find true love, man, unless you let go of some of these unrealistic expectations. I mean, at least you have some leeway around whether she is from heaven or hellâ€¦
Skinny Arty Vegan Nerd seeks Chubby Arty Vegan / Vegetarian Nerd – 28
This posting is purposely devoid of hyperbolic semantics and exaggerated embellishments about who I am or who I claim to beâ€¦
Skinny Arty Vegan Nerd seeks Chubby [bbwâ€¦] Arty Vegan / Vegetarian Nerd for company, camaraderie and companionshipâ€¦
Awww, nerds are just so darn CUTE! Especially when theyâ€™re health-conscious. Doesnâ€™t this just warm the blackened cavity that is your booze-soaked, nicotine-laden, cold, dead heart? Itâ€™s just precious.
Slovenly Hobo Seeks Home
Rightious and opinionated (but soft-spoken) hipster-dufus seeks slumber room to rest head while searching this noble city for meaning and Ms. Right. I’m very easy to get along with and am happy to watch over your couch and belongings while you work. I don’t have money to contribute to rent per se, but I’d be happy to show you or your girlfriend (preferably European) around the big apple and see your food dosen’t go to waste. I will walk your dog or feed your cat, but can not live with any other animals. Must be non-smoking, non-vegetarian, non-420, no weirdos, genuine, clean, open-minded, Miles Davis, JD Salinger, no purfumes, vagabond friendly and painfully generous.
Please remember, you are not alone, no man is an eye-lid.
Manhattan only please…
Ok. So youâ€™re going to eat my food, steal my girlfriend, use my â€œslumber room,â€ and not pay me any rentâ€¦but I canâ€™t even smoke pot or wear perfume? And I HAVE to eat meat for the pleasure of hosting your vagabond ass?
No man is an eye-lid, indeed, but some of them are more retarded than others.
any really hot AND spiritually evolved women out there?
i just haven’t found anyone that suits me spiritually lately. i feel like i’ve decided to move on to the next phase of the journey, but there haven’t been a lot of people that i’ve found that have moved there as well.
let me clear up a couple misconceptions:
1) i’m not christian. i’m not any established religion. i am who i am. if you understand that, that helps.
2) this does not mean that i don’t like sex. i love sex. a lot. so physical attraction is very important to me.
3) as of five minutes ago, i had not seen fit to put myself in the guru status just yet. it’s a journey, but i feel like not many other people are taking it.
so, the type of girl that usually catches my eye: skinny (like vegan thin, without necessarily being a vegan), pretty, not a cookie cutter cheerleader type girl. i love body modifications, tattoos, piercings, but they’re not necessary.
oh, me…i’m 5’7″, 145 lbs, so i’m not big. but i’m in excellent shape, do a lot of yoga. and i’m very cute. that should be enough for now. )
â€œLike vegan thin, without necessarily being a vegan.â€ And this, friends, is why I hate 99% of the population. Had he upgraded himself to guru status, perhaps he wouldnâ€™t be such a douche bag. BARF.
Cute Vegans and Vegetarians ?? – 23
Any cute vegetarians or vegans out there ??
I am an awesome vegetarian who happens to be handsome, smart, and fun.
So hit me back… cuz VEGs always do it better
Ainâ€™t that the truth! Tofu Pup, anyone?
Want to ROAR?
Hit up The Week in Craig Archive:
THE BLACK TABLE