Since you new-age TiVo-ing people no longer gather round your Admiral to watch Geritol commercials, and you all just can’t wait til morning to get your news from a newspaper like good anti-communists, us advertising agencies are being forced, FORCED, to cram our ads into every nook and fucking cranny of your high-tech AD/HD lives. But when we started sticking 15 minutes of ads before movies in theaters, you anti-capitalists just started showing up 15 minutes after show-time. So now, we’ve got Trident White gum sponsoring the cinema floor lightsâ€”what are you gonna do smartypants, find your seat with your fucking eyes closed? Jump for an another new ad intrusion.
There’s something strangely relaxing about staring trance-like at your drying clothes in the laundromat. Or at least there used to be! ABC thought that would be just the place to place an annoying little ad for their stupid show Wipeout. Go ahead, go insane. We’ll sponsor the voices in your head. YOU WILL BE SOLD TO.