Beer Drinking Muslim Woman Will Be Caned

Out of all the places to go check out, Malaysia isn’t one of them. Not as long as shit like this goes on: “Muslim model Kartika Sari Dewi Shukarno has become the first woman in Malaysia to be sentenced to a caning after being caught drinking beer in a beach resort.” According to the Telegraph, the 32-year-old woman who doesn’t even live in the oppressive country will face six lashes at a prison next week. She was charged by the state religious department—the equivalent in the United States would be the Republicans. |Telegraph|

Hip Hop Royalty Attacked By Croatian “Journalists”

A crazed TV cameraman attacked Jay-Z and Beyonce’s bodyguard with a tripod while the couple vacationed in Croatia. Since they’re all mostly crazy over there, the news outlets are reporting that cool headed Hova was physically involved in the ruckus, despite photos and videos that prove to the contrary. Watch below to see how the Hip Hop mogul and his “guardian” deal with the unruly foreign press.

Photo by Branimir Kvartuc/CROPIX
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The Japanese continue to kick the world’s ass when it comes to levitating trains, gadgets, vending machines, kinky fetishes, and evidently, pi. Researchers there calculated the mathematical constant “to over 2.5 trillion decimal places,” breaking a world record and proving that some ethnic stereotypes are true. |PinkTentacle|

Hitting ‘The Street Spot’

How cute, Streetsy just got a girlfriend. Since there’s an obvious shortage of blogs dedicated to documenting street art in NYC, shutterbugs Becki Fuller and Luna Park decided to monetize their flickr streams and launch a new one in collabo with Robots Will Kill. The Street Spot is still a little short on content so we’ll hold off on judging it too much—apart from the bad drippy logo.—but there is “merch,” lots of it, and that’s all that matters. Good luck ladies!

Slutdog Millionaire

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Skin-baring Bollywood star Sherlyn (nee Mona) Chopra, an actress, singer and model of marginal talent according to Wikipedia, gets into bed with PETA in a print ad to protest circus animal abuse in India. Striking a confusing combo Dom/Sub pose, Chopra seems less than committed to the cause, at least judging by her passive facial expression. Here she is previously showing her black panties for PETA, cause unknown. Anyway, we at ANIMAL would love to shoot her chaining and whipping the Ringling Bros. and Barnum & Bailey handlers responsible for this sadistic elephant cruelty. Maybe get S&M and shark-loving Jessica Alba to co-star. We’d call the short film Slap Chopra…or something. |Image: PETA India|

Tabloid and City Launch Attack On Hip Hop

The Post’s fear piece on the hypothetical bloodshed that would result if 50 Cent performs at a charity function founded by Bette Midler, is not just an attack on the rapper, but an assault on Hip Hop itself. The NYPD, the muckraking paper and Bloomberg are endorsing this idea that the sheer act of rhyming words into an amplified microphone is going to instigate violence like some audio version of the “rage virus.” At a press conference the mayor assured the public that “50 Cents” won’t be performing, Queens is safe again. But if the true concern is a fame-seeking assassin willing to kill everyone—Beirut style—why would it matter if there’s live music playing or not? Of course a mini-concert would attract crowds, but that doesn’t mean an apocalyptic showdown is inevitable. Plus, if rap music is too scary for a family day charity event, than imagine how easily Rupert Murdoch’s tabloid can whip up mass hysteria for any happening involving black people and poetry. The mayor is going to be soliciting a whole lot of voices to ensure a 3rd term, I hope Hip Hop’s isn’t one of them.

The masked bandit that escaped the roof of City Hall only to be trapped again will be set free. The affectionately named raccoon has been given a clean bill of health and won’t have to worry about cages soon, reports the Post: “With no signs of disease, Houdini is scheduled to be released in a wooded area somewhere in the five boroughs.” |NYP|

Parting Shot: Throw Up

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Graffiti takes many forms in Los Angeles, barf bags included.

Photo by 14 • 2 • 1

A raccoon trapped in a cage on the roof of City Hall was so gangster that it bent open the age and escaped. It then crawled down some scaffolding where it was caught again, prompting an animal control worker to affectionately name it “Houdini” and describe it as one of the strongest raccoons he’s ever come across. |Gothamist|

The Obama-Joker Mystery Lingers

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The Los Angeles Times identified Firas Khateeb as the artist who modified a Time magazine cover featuring Barack Obama and gave it the Joker treatment (pictured middle), but now everyone’s wondering who cleaned up the image and added the key word: “Socialism.” We thought it could be this Flickr user who did a “quick and dirty Photoshop” and credited Khateeb on August 4th, but the dates don’t really work out since the posters were first spotted back in April. So if you see something, say something