In case you missed it, Somali pirates yesterdays attacked the Maersk Alabama for the second time in seven months, only to be thwarted by armed gunmen on board the ship. Now, you’re probably wondering to yourself, “When will the vicious scourge of Somali piracy ever end?” Well, fear not Sparky, because Nicolas Cage is in Africa right now trying to put an end to all this. Yes, that Nicolas Cage!

How the hell Nicolas Cage got involved in all of this and what his motivations are is anyone’s guess. Perhaps it’s all a PR ploy to make people forget about his ridiculous financial collapse, maybe he’s researching a role for an upcoming flick involving pirates on the open seas, but the star of Knowing, Face Off, National Treasure, and Con Air is currently visiting pirates being held in a Kenyan prison, where they performed some nice African dances for him.

Inmates danced for the movie star and shook his hand as he toured the Shimo La Tewa prison in the Kenyan coastal town of Mombasa. The prison has become a model for other jails in the country because of the reform work of its chief warden, Wanini Kireri.

Cage, a U.N. Goodwill Ambassador on Drugs and Crime, told The Associated Press Television News on Tuesday that he wanted to meet with some of the suspected Somali pirates, hear their stories and understand what is fueling piracy off the Somali coast.

”Then I’m in a position where I can actually make some sense and talk about it when I go back to the States where I go talk to different U.N. councils and discuss the matter,” Cage said.

I have no words.