Hey you know what’s dangerous? Attending Broadway musicals! Those theaters are just filled with catty gay men, middle-aged housewives from Jersey and Long Island, the elderly, and Midwestern tourists…the horror!!! So if you can afford it, it’s probably wise to attend such events in the company of a large man carrying a firearm, because you never know what might happen, just like Glenn Beck.

Page Six reports:

Guests at the other day’s preview of Broadway musical “Memphis” noticed Beck was closely accompanied — even to the men’s room — by a body guard with a gun partially concealed under his jacket.

Smart move by Glenn Beck, because if there’s ever a place he’s likely to be attacked, it’s definitely in the shitter of a Broadway theater house. Godspeed Glenn…you be safe out there crazypants.