Hey you know who loves the constitution? Teabaggers! Hell, they masturbate to the framed copies they keep above the urn holding Grandma Mable’s remains. They’re all up in that shit, braying endlessly about how the negro president wants to violate the constitution and take a big Chicago ghetto dump on America by taking away their guns and paying for abortions with taxpayer money and silencing the radio talk show hosts who tell them exactly how to think each day. But you know what they hate? People whose ideology differs from their own exercising their constitutional right to free speech by exhibiting dissent at Teabagger orgies of idiocy, like this guy who was almost crucified JESUS-style because he showed up at Glenn Beck’s 9/12 retard summit carrying a sign advocating the public option.

You know, I thought for a hot minute about donning some camo and a John Deere cap (I make a very convincing redneck!) and traveling to DC with a camcorder to go undercover at this shitshow, but then I remembered it was football season and that there was cold beer in my fridge and, well, my capacity for abstract thought would probably make me want to kill myself after spending five minutes in the midst of these morons. This video pretty much confirms that.