Palin-Suicide

Last week, America found itself subjected to an unrelenting parade of righteous sanctimony, staggering idiocy and unabashed martyrdom in the form of Carrie Prejean’s dumb book publicity tour. Now this week it’s Sarah Palin turn, and you just know that Trixie Klondyke, Alaskan Warrior Princess will not stand for some upstart blonde prolific sex tape-maker from California trying to take away her crown as the Golden Twat of modern American conservatism. Carrie, consider yourself on notice…It is on!

Yes, Rootin’ Tootin’ Sarah will be EVERYWHERE this week, saying maverick-y things in that oh-so-familiar folksy word soup fashion that has become her trademark. Today she’ll be on Oprah…tomorrow she’ll be on Good Morning America, Nightline and World News Tonight…Wednesday she’ll be on GMA again as well as Hannity and Friday she’ll be on 20/20. Sadly, it doesn’t look as though she’ll be making a Letterman appearance.

Meanwhile, the early returns are rolling in and the vast majority of people who’ve actually seen Palin’s opus seem to agree that yes, it is every bit the Titanic dungheap of shitteousness everyone expected it to be, filled with outright lies, bitchy whining, moral indignation and general dumbassery. The only person who seems to like it is Rush Limbaugh, who called it “one of the most substantive policy books I’ve read.” That probably says it all, no?

Stay tuned to ANIMAL as we will be breathlessly mocking and ridiculing Palin’s traveling clown circus throughout the week.

Image via the amazing Zina Saunders