CB065532 Yesterday, the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that a “man accused of two misdemeanors for allegedly arranging to buy 2 grams of cocaine over the phone cannot be charged with “facilitating” the dealer’s felonies.” Basically, some poor bastard with a “scary” name was upgraded to six felony counts for calling his dealer, who was being wiretapped by the FBI, on a cell phone for a Smurf-amount of blow. The government argued that he was “facilitating” the acts of the dealer by calling him and should therefore face more charges. Shockingly, a dumb ass jury concurred, deciding in favor of ruining Salman Khade Abuelhawa’s life. Thankfully, the court didn’t agree with either the government or the people.

Instead they argued that it doesn’t matter whether custies buy drugs in person or over the phone and that this idea of “facilitating” a dealer is irrelevant. Soon-to-retire Justice Souter wrote:

“A buyer does not just make a sale easier; he makes the sale possible. No buyer, no sale; the buyer’s part is already implied by the term ‘sale,’ and the word ‘facilitate adds nothing.”