Party With Manhattan’s Nightlife Elite for Haiti!

If you’ve ever dreamed of doing coke in a bathroom stall at 1Oak to better enhance your partying with Amy Sacco, Richie Akiva and Gabriel Byrne at a humanitarian fundraiser, tonight is your night Sparky. And all for $40 at the door! Here’s the full press release: Read more »

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Song Birds

As part of a multimedia installation opening at the Barbican gallery in London, French artist Céleste Boursier-Mougenot is assembling a bunch of musical instruments and birds together in a “walk-through aviary,” leading to pure musical madness. |Joanne Casey|

Here’s some news that should piss of creationists: researchers now believe that animals may have migrated to the isolated island of Madagascar by way of “natural rafts.” |DNAIndia|

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MADD Yet Again Tries To Talk Teens Out Of Getting Smashed

It’s underage drinking month on ANIMAL! In this latest spot, via the New Mexico chapter of the 30-year-old Texas-based organization, the concerned, abstract Mothers have decided to abandon driving references, and just hit drunkenness head on with a blunt message they hope will get through even the thickest kids’ skulls. Read more »

Man Calls Police to Complain About Being Stiffed By Prostitute, Gets Arrested for Soliciting Prostitutes

Here’s a word of advice for all of you whore-mongers out there, and you can thank me later…if a prostitute provides you with shitty services, or just plain doesn’t provide you with any after you’ve already paid for them, don’t call the local police to file a complaint. Instead, call the Better Business Bureau. They LOVE dealing with cases like that. |Union Leader via Pat’s Papers|

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Quake In Haiti Caused By US Military Says Hugo Chavez

Extreme conspiracy theorists and Venezuelan President Hugo Chavez are insisting the earthquake in Haiti was caused by a secret tectonic weapon—like HAARP—that was being tested by the US Navy with the intention of occupying the island nation and eventually destroying Iran.

Judge Shoots Down Any Hope for Ja Rule

The good news: Ja Rule doesn’t have to worry about that little bag of weed in his possession when he was arrested, the judge is tossing that evidence out. The bad news: He does have to worry about the gun police found in his car. The 33-year-old could face up to four years if he’s found guilty. |NYDN|

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John Edwards Finally Admits What We All Already Knew

Oh look…John Edwards is finally admitting publicly on the Today Show that he is the father of Rielle Hunter’s child! Sadly, the man manages to look slimy and cowardly even in coming clean as he had one of his flunkies go on camera to do the explaining for him rather than doing it himself. Read more »

Scott Brown’s Daughter Arianna Has A Thing For Horses

Even since he put their nether-flowers on the market Tuesday night, interest in new Massachusetts Senator Scott Brown’s daughters has skyrocketed. Yesterday, a tipster sent us a sexy pic of Ayla and Arianna with their proud pop. And now another has apparently dug up some photos of Arianna posing with her horsie on her Facebook page. How cute!

Banksy Documentary At Sundance Executive Produced By Banksy Associate

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The Hollywood Reporter confirmed that Banksy documentary, “Exit Through the Giftshop,” is premiering on Sunday night as part of the Sundance Film Festival’s “Spotlight Surprise.” It was executive produced by Banksy’s high ranking associate, Holly Cushing, who coordinated his very profitable show in LA, headed Pest Control, managed the Lazarides Gallery, and scolded this guy for using the artist’s images in some video. Read more »