At one point or another, I’m sure we have all wanted to disappear; you know, after that footage came out of you sucking that bear off (San Francisco is a crazy place, okay?) or after your mugshot was projected across the country, a cute moniker was coined, and an all-out manhunt was on its way; it’s safe to say that almost everyone has thought about falling off the face of the planet (and evading the police) before.
Have you ever thought about the actual logistics involved in leaving without a trace, though? Shit is crazy, and near impossible in this day and age. Apparently though, it can still be done. Just ask the McStay family, of San Diego, California. I mean, if you can find them.
February 4th of this year is the last time anyone had heard from Joseph or Summer McStay. It seems that they, and their two children, went all Aztec on everyone’s ass and vanished without so much as a blog entry about it. The family’s car was found 80 miles from their home, and two blocks away from the U.S.-Mexican border; as well as information on their computer thatsurfaced the other day, indicating that searches regarding passports (and the lack thereof) were made.
Though most information now points to a voluntary exit, many friends and family still suspect foul play. Joseph’s brother says that they spoke at least once a week, and the family leaving without saying goodbye or dropping any hints to an extensive absence is very uncharacteristic of them; not to mention that the family’s dogs were found at the house without food or water, and there hasn’t been complete inactivity when it comes to credit cards or bank accounts, not to mention that an exorbitant amount of money was not taken out of the account prior to their disappearance.
A more high-profile disappearance was of one Richey Edwards, guitarist and lyricist of the Manic Street Preachers. Known for his erratic behaviour and depressive nature, Richey went missing on February 1, 1995. On the 14th, his car was found with a flat battery and evidence that someone had lived in it for some time, and was deemed abandoned. The two weeks leading up to the 1st, Edwards took out 200 pounds per day from his bank account, which totaled somewhere around 2800 pounds, but other than that had no money that anyone is aware of. Since 1995 he has been “seen” at a market in Goa, India and on the islands of Fuerteventura, Lanzarote and other non-American places I have never heard of, along with Tupac, Elvis, and Cuba Gooding Jr.
Fortunately for me, disappearing would be quite simple (I can hear the cheers of encouragement now), as all Asians look the same. So, next time you’re on the Fung Wah take a closer look at the seemingly intoxicated driver, screaming into his cellphone; or the dehydrated apple head Korean handing your dry cleaning back, because you just never know.
If you have any information regarding the McStay family, call Sgt. Dave Martinez at 858-565-5200.
First off. "Emergency This Book Could Save Your Life" by Neil Strauss is essential reading. What I learned? A St. Kitts passport is the fast track to getting off the grid.
There is no one formula. I have been off the grid for over 4.5 years. Nobody knows my real identity or whereabouts. The secret is to make sure nobody gives a shit about your whereabouts or identity.. That probably wont happen with you.. so your next best bet would be a marketable "off the grid" talent.. rasing goats, massages, growing mushrooms etc. Hit me up for more info.
Best.
Sounds like you are already doing a little homework here. Oh Kari, if you would only disappear like this one day……Animal readers will then be liberated from your daily tales of anal sex, jail, drugs, porn, phony cancer stories, beastiality, necrophilia and the general self-absorbed tales of woe you are inflicting upon us!
I suggest you go to Nigeria, where you can buy a new identity for yourself right at the airport. The government officials there will be happy to sell you anyone you want to be and give you a freshly minted passport. Maybe you can re-invent yourself and become a Missionary, and spread some good words for a change.