There’s no doubt that we are slaves to our computers; consistently checking our email, Twitter feed and Facebook page; downloading tranny porn; and occasionally getting work done. Due to this fact, we are subsequently slaves to one major corporation called Google. Soon enough they will have their Orwellian/Huxley-esque paws on more than they already do, securing their place as Ruler of Your Soul.

A couple of weeks ago Google released Google Instant, which is a Google enhancement that claims to save you two to five Google seconds on your Google searches.

Sure, it’s somewhat convenient, and fun things have been done with it, but is this just another way for Google to silently control our lives?

Today, Google Instant’s Blacklist was released by 2600’s hack-happy staff. Consisting of words that Google Instant deems inappropriate or offensive. When you search for these words, nothing is delivered. It seems that this is their sad attempt at barring potentially saucy things from coming up as you type, but when “colon buster” and “people in heat” still works, I can’t imagine it’s working too well.

Some of the more interesting phrases to be banned are “rapping women,” “wrinkled starfish,” “gay men,” “servitude,” and “happy slapping video.” So, from this we can clearly deduce that Google is comprised of a bunch of misogynistic, homophobic, echinodermophobic, haters of fun.

Just as there are words that a normal person wouldn’t consider deserving of a Google ban, there are several words that you would assume would be on the list, that aren’t. Some of these include, “fag,” “how to commit suicide,” “wrapping women,” and my personal favorite “shaved fish.”

So, it seems that shoving someone in a latex suit is A-OK, but a woman who rhymes is of the devil. Okay, Google, you’ve got me there.

Honestly, I’m looking forward to whatever other tricks Google has up their collective sleeve. Until then, I’ll be petitioning to free Pedobear.