Drug dealers in Rome reportedly employed a 10-foot albino python to protect their coke and according to an Italian police officer, this was no dumb snake: “From our investigation we can say it had been trained to watch over the drugs.” Ha. I’m no zoological expert, but assume it was better at scaring the shit out of customers taking things on the arm than it was a guard animal. Evidently, using reptiles to frighten people is a time honored tradition in Italy.