NATIONAL:

  • Alaska Republican Joe Miller and his blue ox, Babe, are suing in federal court to uphold the senate election ballot count and something something, etc. You knew this was going to happen. |Joe Miller campaign|
  • Miller’s also mad about federal money invading Alaska; it has a “pervasive and illegitimate sway” on voters and on unhappily married husbands. |Joe Miller campaign|
  • Republicans are already coming up with ways to save America’s ca$h, such as, “we won’t spend money on programs that don’t exist.” |Think Progress|
  • STFU already about Kanye West, fetus-outside-a-jar George W. Bush. |Daily Beast|
  • While Bush continues to obsessively complain about how a pop singer insulted him once, a Baltimore woman is hunger-striking to protest the foreclosure on her home and the homes of millions of other people. |Newser|
  • And children die senselessly. |Mother Jones|
  • Bush says he would have endorsed Barack Obama over John McCain? “Bush continues to prove the point that nothing is worse then a dry drunk,” says a commenter. Yeah.  [Think Progress|
  • Maybe Bush is just bullshitting us about liking Obama more than McCain, just like he might be bullshitting us about that fetus. |Pandagon|
  • Sarah Palin did something dumb. |Raw Story|
  • Arnold Schwarzenegger told Jay Leno (“People‘s Funniest Man Alive”) that “no one cares if you smoke a joint or not.” At that moment, California released every non-violent drug offender from its overstuffed prisons. |Daily Beast|
  • President Barack Obama-Sotero gave a speech in Indonesia, one of his native countries. |WSJ|
  • Indonesian minister Tifatul Sembiring touched Michelle Obama, even though Muslimism specifically forbids men from touching Michelle Obamas. The skin-to-skin encounter was all her fault, that teasy, touchy broad. |NY Times|
  • Glenn Beck is guest-editing all the lady mags this season, to bring them up to his gold standard. |Jezebel|

METRO:

  • 9/11 first responders get another week to sign onto the big city settlement that’s meant to make up for their health horrors. |NY1|
  • Meanwhile, Latino workers say they’re getting left out of settlement talks. |Queens Courier|
  • Councilman Eric Ulrich watched the Muppets Take Manhattan the other day. |Twitter|
  • Toilet blaze! So hot.|NY Post|
  • The city will happily accept your free ideas for its 2020 Waterfront Plan. What would you like: free yacht transportation? Montauk Monster rides? Beaches of cocaine-sand? Name it, it’s yours. |NYC.gov|
  • Two Bahamian straw vendors who were arrested in NYC in September for selling counterfeit goods are back at work,  but they really don’t want to talk about it. |Nassau Tribune|
  • Small Business Saturday is a new “movement,” brought to you by Am Ex. |Crains|