Both Glenn Beck and Sean Hannity have lost their host station in Philadelphia–the very station where Beck broadcast his show from 1787 to 1789, before he got mega-famous. Everybody agrees that losing such an important market is a huge blow to them. SORRY GUYS. THERE’S ALWAYS PHOENIX.

Beck suddenly hates Philadelphia so much, because they’re so mean for dissing him and the constitutional principles he supports. As the folks at Think Progress report, Beck has since smeared the city of brotherly love–telling his audience that it is a terrible, dangerous place where you never want to be ever, because you’ll get killed in “the killing streets.” If this is true, it’s because now you will have to avoid angry, armed Beck supporters who are pissed off that they can’t listen to “The Glenn Beck Hour” or whatever it’s called while they’re driving.

As for Hannity, he’s apparently been quiet. Which makes Beck look even worse, because when Hannity comes off as being classier than you, you are failing large.

Philly isn’t the only loss these two have experienced in recent months: Beck lost WOR in New York a few weeks ago, and Hannity lost a market in Utah. Could these guys be on the outs? Hmmmmm.

Beck has a strange kind of psycho crybaby appeal, so his fame makes sense in a way. But I never understood how Hannity got so far: he has nothing distinguishable about him except for a permanent squint.