A New York real-estate broker Richard Silver was sentenced for selling counterfeit Damien Hirst spots. See, what happened was is that bought some “spots” that turned out to be forgeries, so he re-sold the fakes on eBay. Now he’s headed to Rikers Island for sixty days.

A professional fraudster from Irvine, California sold Mr. Silver the spotty collection for $84,000. They were just like the “real” spots, but Damien Hirst’s assistants didn’t paint them. We reckon they performed a taste test?

So, the original crook went to prison for selling Silver spots that were just spots, and not same-looking spots magically transmuted into art because Hirst christened them. Then, in a misguided a-ha moment, swindled Silver figured he’d falsify some appraisals to get these damn spots out of his life. When he got called on the hustle, he refunded the wised-up eBay buyers through Paypal, until one pesky unsatisfied customer went to the D.A. Tsk-tsk.

Now, the photographer, art collector and [former] member of Corcoran’s “Multi-Million Dollar Sales Club” will “teach other inmates job preparedness skills” at Rikers Island.