It’s the hottest thing to come out of Poland since pierogi and teen models! The demand for exorcisms in Poland has dramatically increased in the last few years, the demon-chasing workforce growing from four to 120 over the last 15 years. It’s even got its own rulebook approved by Polish-born pope John Paul II in the 90s.

The market’s prime and ready, so the country’s leading demonologists and Roman Catholic priest specialists will launch a monthly magazine dedicated to chasing out the demons, with articles like “New Age — the spiritual vacuum cleaner” and “Satan is real.”

“It’s indirectly due to changes in the system: capitalism creates more opportunities to do business in the area of occultism. Fortune telling has even been categorised as employment for taxation,” says the country’s leading exorcist Father Aleksander Posacki. He also points out that he’s Posacki, the real Posacki, all you other Posackis are immitatin’ wackies. He’s got wisdom about how levitation isn’t as common as screaming, per say, “but it does occur and we must speak about it – I’ve seen it with my own eyes.” He’s legit. He can teach you, but he won’t charge. Because  real exorcism are supposed to be free.