“I am Jill’s nipples,” quoth graffiti on the $11.9 million pedestrian bridge at East 78th street. Those damn “kids,” one pedestrian complains. Yeah, really, those damn “kids” quoting Palahniuk’s 1996 book or Fincher’s 1999 movie.

“There isn’t part of the city people don’t ruin,” she goes on, whining about abandoned beer bottles on the bridge and condom wrappers in a nearby park, because clearly at least her part of the city you shouldn’t ruin, tsk-tsk. Clearly.

I am Jack’s complete lack of surprise.

(Image: DNA Info)