Famous Hacker Is Bad Rapper

Geohot, née George Hotz, the hacker who was the first to jailbreak an iPhone back in 2007–at age 17, no less–also makes rap songs, as The Verge points out. Let’s have a look at his SoundCloud.

Needless to say, he is not exactly Kendrick Lamar. Fuck, he’s not even Paul Barman. “Literally Sick” is Odd Future-lite, three years too late, with lyrics like “Round up a cavewoman, stomp her out with Doc Martens/Screaming bitch make me dinner like a little white Cartman” over a tinny beat that sounds like a Garage Band loop. At least on “25 Down Guarana” he sticks to what he knows, rapping about Apple IIe’s and Ixquick. Let’s keep listening, shall we?

These are pretty ugly. Kudos for picking the “Drive Slow” beat, but the petulant /r/MensRights whining about how women have all the power in social situations is definitely not the wave. And I’ll stay away from the Drake-style autotuned emoting on “Cycles.”

All in all, it’s a good reminder that rapping, as easy as the pros can sometimes make it look, is really fucking hard.

(Photo: Vivid Gamer)