Oh look, it’s an actual clip of Lars Von Trier’s highly-anticipated new movie Vagina Emoticon. If you were hoping for a preview of that cutting-edge technology that will morph-mesh porn-star-fuck-bits and Charlotte-Gainsbourg-Shia-LaBeouf-Uma-Thurman-heads into a glorious CGI orgy of sexual cynicism, moral subjectivity and whatever the opposite of Dogma film is BUT NO.

Here’s a disappointingly SFW clip. Looks like Lars Von Trier has forgone allegorical spirituality of Antichrist and Melancholia for the third two-part installment of the saga (at least, in this little scene) and is getting all expository and shit…

Chapter 1: The Compleat Angler

How does an ordinary bag of chocolate sweets become a symbol of sexual victory?

As Joe and her experienced friend B embark on a train trip, they bet on how many men they can seduce on the ride.

The grand prize is a delicious bag of chocolate sweets, and it soon becomes clear to Joe that in order to win, she needs to lure the prey into biting the hook like a skilled fisherman.

Boobs or GTFO.