Last week, Fox News talking head Megyn Kelly told “all the kids” watching the right-wing cable network that “Santa just is white,” in response to a Slate editorial by Aisha Harris on her childhood feelings of alienation that Santa Claus is predominantly portrayed as a beardy Caucasian. With a straight face, Kelly added:

Jesus was a white man, too. It’s like we have, he’s a historical figure that’s a verifiable fact, as is Santa, I just want kids to know that. How do you revise it in the middle of the legacy in the story and change Santa from white to black?

In the spirit of facts, ANIMAL made this website for all you kids reading at home. Have you heard the good word? Pass it on:

There have been several great responses to Fox News’ seasonal deluge of Christmas-themed insanity. Jon Stewart, citing the research into actual physiological characteristics of “historical figure” Greek Saint Nicolas, said: “My guess is that there’d be no Christmas if he looked like that dude, because he’s probably still on the no-fly list.” As Reza Aslan told The Washington Post, Jesus wasn’t white-looking either.

Megyn Kelly’s own recent response has been the most hilarious.

The fact that an off-hand jest I made during a segment about whether Santa should be replaced by a penguin has now become a national firestorm says two things: Race is still an incredibly volatile issue in this country, and Fox News, and yours truly, are big targets for many people.

I also did say Jesus was white. As I’ve learned in the past two days, that is far from settled.

Poor Megyn Kelly! She said something incredibly dumb and factually disproven on a news show, and all these race-merchants are attacking her!

In case you missed it, here’s the “off-hand jest” she made on live television:

(Microsite design: Nate Cepis/ANIMALNewYork)