This week’s winner for most batshit rant at a routine community board meeting goes to Mr. Salsano of the Upper West Side.

Seems like residents near Riposo 72 are terrified that the wine bar’s yet-to-be-built 16-seat sidewalk cafe and liquor license will “erode” the “quality of life” and “complexion” of their “bedroom community” near Central Park West and the Dakota.

Their enemy? “Internet people!” DNAinfo reports:

Resident Al Salsano griped that the wine bar has a limited food menu and attracts people who use it as a place for dates after meeting online.

“I have seen people say, ‘I met you on the internet,’ and you’re putting that on the sidewalk?” he said incredulously. “I don’t want children walking near ‘internet people’ meeting.”

Another resident reasonably suggested that there are other outdoor cafes nearby and it’s not that bad. Someone else replied that he wouldn’t know anything about that, because “I don’t go out to meet people I found on the internet.”

At the end, the board recommended approving the liquor license anyway. Meanwhile, we advise for all residents concerned about “internet people” to stay indoors. It’s a real epidemic out there. (Photo: Riposo 72)