MACHETE Trailer: Arizona Edition

05.06.10 Marina Galperina


“This is for Arizona!” growls Machete in an uncomfortably timely trailer re-release for Ethan Maniquis/Robert Rodriguez’s Grindhouse take on immigration politics. “They’ve just fucked with the wrong Mexican.” See what happens next.

So, that fake trailer before Planet Terror wasn’t fake after all. Danny Trejo is Machete, hired by a crooked businessman to assassinate a corrupt senator (Robert DeNiro) but is “set-up, double-crossed, left for dead” and captured. He escapes and returns to wreak vengeance on immigrant-deporting gringos with a lot of machetes and a posse.

The posse includes priest Cheech and Michelle Rodrigues (looking good in a classic Grindhouse eye-patch). Also, there’s Lindsey Lohan dressed as a nun, felating a gun. Which explains those photos now (marketing set-up?). Anyway, she’s got a job now so maybe the tabloids will stop telling her to kill herself. Still trying to win back Latinos, Jessica “I’m not Hispanic” Alba is Machete’s hot piece and an immigration agent with a change of heart, yelling:

We didn’t cross the border! The border crossed us!

In theaters September 3.