Tabloid Builds “Perfect” Frankenstein Woman, Run Away!

01.26.11 Marina Galperina

The New York Post presents: The hottest selling body parts on the plastic surgery market these days, cobbled together into one “Perfect Woman.” She has Taylor Swift’s hair, Halle Berry’s jaw line, Anne Hathaway’s eyes, January Jones’s cheeks, Natalie Portman’s nose, Scarlett Johansson’s lips and is creepy enough to make Cher’s tautest face lift crawl.

No offense to the stars’ dismembered pretty parts, but no, thank you. Even if you stick that mishmash mosaic mug on top of Penelope Cruz’s awesome body, no. This just isn’t reasonable. Let’s assume a disclaimer is implied and some Ms. Moneybags somewhere isn’t considering to nip-and-tuck maul ‘n’ scalp herself according to this trendy menu, ghegh.