Richard and Mayumi Heene, parents to Falcon Heene, known from here to eternity as “Balloon Boy,” are set to plead guilty to charges brought against them for perpetrating the most retarded hoax to ever captivate America. |NPR|
One week ago today in the early afternoon I remember thinking to myself, “Gee, this sure is a slow news day.” And then Balloon Boy happened. Now, I’m as sick as anyone is of the Heene family at this point, but I do have questions in my mind about this whole charade that continue to nag the shit out of me. Read more »
The Heene family is mentally exhausted from lying to the media and so they penned this note to the many journalists camped outside of their house and stuck it on their front door: “Thank you for all of your support. We are not taking any interview any more. We are tired. Thank you. Heenes.” In related news, Balloon Boy hoax mastermind, Richard Heene, believes that the world will end in 2012 and all sorts of other delightful oddities. |EOnline|
Colorado Sheriff Jim Alderden Declares the Obvious: Balloon Boy ‘Was A Hoax’
Authorities in Colorado held a press conference today and Sheriff Jim Alderden announced that the Balloon Boy saga was indeed a media-whoring prank: “It has been determined this was a hoax, a publicity stunt to market a reality show.” No charges have been filed against the parents, yet, but it’s likely that they could face at least two felony and misdemeanor counts.
Well here we are day one ABB (After Balloon Boy), and America’s innocence continues to circle the drain as Falcon Heene’s parents push he and his siblings further and further into the media spotlight. This morning the Hennes appeared on just about every morning news show known to man, causing Falcon to puke on live TV — TWICE — which in turn made me just want to cry for the poor kid. Read more »
Woah, did Balloon Boy aka Falcon Heene just say what I think he said? The little boy who interrupted the country for over three hours was on Larry King Live tonight with his family and when asked why he didn’t come out of his hiding place when he heard his parents calling his name, the six-year-old answered, pretty matter-of-factly, “You guys said, that, um, we did this for the show.” Watch as the fact-revealing video evidence begins to emerge at about the :28 mark below. Read more »
UPDATE: Balloon Boy Found Alive in Family Attic, World Loses at Most Epic Game of Hide and Seek EVER
Well, barely 5 minutes after I posted this “I hope he’s just hiding in the basement” diatribe, the mystery’s been solved: Falcon Heene was hiding in the family ATTIC the whole time. I need a fucking drink. |CNN|
America, Get Used to the Heene Family
While the search and rescue operation for Falcon Heene continues, more and more is being learned about the kooky family he hails from, and you can bet that more and more information about the Heenes will revealed over the next 24-48 hours. Regardless of whether or not this turns out to be a horrifying tragedy or one of the biggest hoaxes in American history, the Heenes are here to stay, so get used to them. The parents are batshit crazy and the kids are obviously precocious…hello reality show!!! America, you’ve just been introduced to the new Gosselins. Read more »
Whoa! Look what’s been sitting out there on YouTube since March…a rap song/video called “Not Pussified” starring Falcon Heene, aka Balloon Boy, and his brothers. God I hate to be presumptuous here, but I’ll be shocked if this whole thing doesn’t turn out to be a hoax. Read more »
The giant helium balloon chase that has riveted the nation for the last hour or so has come to end…the balloon has hit the ground after a soft landing, but there was no child inside. Either Falcon Heene fell out at some point or this is all an elaborate hoax. A side note…Falcon’s parents are storm chasers who’ve appeared on ABC’s Wife Swap…twice. Again, a live video feed of this madness is available from MSNBC here.
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