Meet Jay. He was number one on the line at the 34th Street Foot Locker in Manhattan Thursday evening for the midnight release of the new ‪Air Jordans. They’re the sneakers that have been causing chaos in NYC, well Staten Island, and all across the country.

Why are people rioting for a pair of kicks? Who knows, but he does offer a glimpse of the passion sneaker collectors have.

Although this Greenepeace ‘Detox’ commercial has some sort of message about how Nike and Adidas are polluting the environment or something, I was too busy looking at all the cool sneakers to notice it.

Check out this Nike commercial catering to golf fans and Satanists alike. It’s dark, chilling, and comes on the one year anniversary of Tiger Woods possibly getting attacked by his wife with a golf club for banging porn stars and various sluts by the dozen.

Earlier today, worker bees from Nike’s downtown ‘Stadium‘ space pretended to be vandals and stuck black and white stickers that read “New York Against the World” all over the facade of 276 Bowery as the NYPD studiously kept watch from the street. So much for innovation, they basically used the same slogan on their other cool guy spot at 255 Elizabeth Street.

I’m not a joiner. I wanted to so hate this epic three-minute Nike World Cup spot—which will air in 32 countries—much like I hated their overwrought “I’ve got soul, but I’m not a soldier” Beijing Olympics spot. But fuck if this isn’t one of the most entertaining sports commercials ever.

If you don’t know soccer, you won’t recognize many of these athletes, but the rest of the world will. England’s talented asshole Wayne Rooney is the centerpiece of the spot. A couple of American players, Landon Donovan and goalie Tim Howard make appearances; the rest of the world will find THAT to be laughable. (The US’s best player, Clint Dempsey, should have been included.) Look for the Roger Federer and Kobe Bryant cameos. The Homer/Ronal-D’oh! confrontation is funny. The production budget for this thing was probably more than our agency makes in a year. By Wieden & Kennedy Amsterdam.

If you happened to watch ESPN over the weekend, there’s a good chance you saw the latest Nike puppet ads featuring Blitzen, he of Santa’s reindeer fame, laying down some smack on Santa, Kobe Bryant and Lebron James.

If you haven’t seen them you should because they’re pretty great, thus, they’re embedded in this here post. Above is the part one where Blitzen, voiced by Lupe Fiasco, runs his trash talk, and below is part two where Blitzen gets served proper by Kobe, LeBron and Santa, voiced by KRS-One. Enjoy.

Technically, Nike can’t be held directly responsible for this footwear atrocity that was pieced together by the sneaker customizing zealots at Solefood. The ‘Canal Street’ Air Force Ones were designed to supposedly “bring awareness to the fake industry” or something. By what, replicating it? The kicks feature a patchwork of the luxury brands most likely to be counterfeited in the neighborhood notoriously known for proliferating knock-offs. |KicksOnFire|

Tomorrow, Kanye West’s ridiculous looking, yet highly sought after Nike collaborated Air Yeezy sneakers come out. With only a limited amount available, sneakerheads have already began camping out in front of the Foot Locker on 34th Street, right across from Macy’s. The first few people have been there since yesterday morning and don’t plan on moving despite what the security guards tell them or this shadowy website. Craziest of all, there’s no guarantee they’ll even get a pair. Watch as this kid pleads with ‘Ye to show some support: “Hopefully Kanye can come hold it down with us, man. Cause we’re doing this for the shoes. We’ve been out here, it’s cold out here. And we got the Swine Flu out here.”