Photographer Sergey Maximishin recently shot these literarily gut-wrenching artifacts at a “museum” of a Russian prison hospital. The loot — sets of dominoes, beaten spoon shanks, dozens of rusty nails — were removed from the contents of the prisoners’ stomaches in the Soviet ’50s and ’60s, presumably swallowed as tools of escape. What’s more odd here — the rusty junk itself or the decades-old cardboard mounting with its lovingly adorned “frames” drawn by hand with makers and a ruler, muaw muaw.

The Diary of Anne Frank

So, despite a 60% illiteracy rate, cons are relating to Holocaust victims and depressed privileged damsels, meanwhile reading up on power tips like “conceal your intentions” and “discover each man’s thumbscrew.”

The inmates’ critique of author photos is also insightful. Gabriel García Márquez: “That man is a liar.” Flannery O’Connor:

She looks kind of busted up, y’know? She ain’t too pretty. I trust her.

Crime stuff is most popular though, especially novels about incarceration, which doesn’t seem very escapist as a distraction from boredom and the threat of rape.

Prison inmates pitted against bulls, getting their faces broken in with hooves for some hick cheers? Welcome to Oklahoma’s penal system.

See female prison inmates carted out in cattle trailers to maybe get hoof-impaled at the “rough stock rodeo.” They tear up from joy, because they can really “touch freedom”… if freedom is a trampling bull.  Sweethearts of the Prison Rodeo is a touching doc where “We don’t want anyone to get hurt or get killed, but if they do, you darn sure don’t want to miss it.”

Here are some photos shot by female convicts inside a penitentiary in Romania. As part of Cosmin Bumbut’s prison workshop, fourteen women with six Canon PowerShots have captured intimate, narrative images – the type of photography that few professionals can achieve. Nifty doing: The convicts get a creative outlet and the project’s organizer scores a bounty of work. See more below and here. How does Los Angeles correctional not have a similar program?

Dutch killer, Joran van der Sloot, isn’t so happy about the prospects of being incarcerated for decades in Peru, and according to local newspaper El Comercio, he told police: “I am afraid I will be killed.” I wonder what gave him that idea. Maybe it was the ride over?

You know who you don’t want to fuck with in prison? Bernie Madoff, that’s who! You especially don’t want to fuck with Bernie Madoff about stocks. So don’t roll up in the yard spouting off horseshit about the wisdom of short-selling corn futures, because Bernie will straight open up a can of whup-ass on you, just like he did some old dude recently.

I’m guessing that Madoff, who hired a “prison consultant” to provide him with survival tips for his new life inside the joint, was following the old rule that you go after someone in full view of other inmates to scare everyone out of messing you. Or something.

Reports the New York Post:

Madoff, serving 150 years at the Butner, NC, federal prison, was heard last week getting into a heated debate over the state of the market with another senior-citizen jailbird.

The shouting match got so heated that the inmate pushed Madoff, who shoved back harder with both hands, causing his attacker to stumble.

As the attacker tried to stand up straight, Madoff hovered over him red-faced and glaring, eyewitnesses said.

The stunned attacker went chicken and took off — allowing Madoff to collect some “cred” among his fellow prisoners.

“I didn’t think Bernie had it in him. He got the best of him; he was really aggressive, and the other guy was in shock that he fought back,” an inmate said.

Fellow inmates said that the scuffle took place on a ball field out of view of the prison’s guards, who would have thrown Madoff and his victim into the hole had they been spotted scuffling. The two reportedly kissed and made up the next day.

Again, if you get locked up, don’t you dare fuck with Brawlin’ Bernie. Consider yourself warned.

A word of warning to vegan graffiti writers: don’t get caught in New York City. Graffiti bomber turned designer CLAW paid a friendly visit to UTAH, who is recently incarcerated on Riker’s Island, and twitters: “She said it’s not so bad, like a ghetto sleepaway camp. Suave shamps. She is starving b/c she is vegan. No tempeh on the island apparently.” According to the Department of Corrections, inmates with special dietary needs have to go to the clinic and get the nutrionist to issue a special id card. Apparently that’s easier said than done.

Over instant message, CLAW tells us it took a lawsuit-threatening letter before “they finally got her soy milk and peanut butter.” The other option is finding a chaplain, like Rabbi Leib Glanz, to illegally hook up Goodfellas-style prison feasts.

Photo by true2death