The Statue is about to take a year long break starting on October 29th for a $27.25 million dollar renovation, which is good news to the busy security officers on site. This year alone over 5300 knives, 7000 cans of pepper spray and 5000 other miscellaneous weapons were confiscated, numbers that should make anyone even thinking of robbing tourists think twice.

A new YouTube suggests that yes, New York City is in fact the “great city of lavish luxery (sic) and wickedness” God had in mind when he talked about the end times. For irrefutable evidence purposes, the video’s creators—an Ohio-based outfit d/b/a WEFworks—include photos of Shalimar perfume and that New York staple of life, Metrocards gold ingots.

Watch the video, which features chill pan-Asian restaurant muzak, and count how many examples of “Chaldean Pride” you spot:

Confusingly, the video also talks about Babylon being a “nation,” and flashes photos of Beverly Hills superstar mansions, Las Vegas, Lil Jon, and other non-New York things. Then it reverts back to answering its original question, showing pix of the Statue of Liberty and the NYC skyline. Thankfully, WEFworks links to a blog post by one “Peter Goodgame,” who clears up matters somewhat. “Biblical indicators,” he explains, “point unequivocally and obviously to America as the great power known as Mystery Babylon, and New York City as the specific city destined to fall in Revelation 18.”

According to the book of Revelations, Mystery Babylon was “the city of power,” respected by the “kings of the earth”; this, says Goodgame, was God’s way of referring to the United Nations. It was also represented by some sort of woman symbol. Writes Goodgame:

Richard Coombes makes a solid case that our Statue of Liberty is in fact a representation of the ancient Babylonian goddess Ishtar. Ishtar was next to Marduk at the top of the Babylonian pantheon of gods, and her cult promoted “the notion of personal freedom and liberty to pursue a wild hedonistic sexual lifestyle of immense promiscuity,” (Coombes). Basically her philosophy has been recreated here in America and is the same as the ’60s mantra of “if it feels good, do it!” Central to her cult was the practice of prostitution for religious purposes, thus the scripture of Revelation 17:5, “…The Mother of Prostitutes…”

That characterization doesn’t bode well for those thawing U.S.-French relations.

The biggest problem is that both God and the Antichrist are supposed to wreck the shit out of Mystery Babylon/NYC at some point. The destruction phase includes angels, trumpets, blood, and meteors. WEFworks’ advice? “Just get out of, and far enough away from that city to be safe while staying within the United States.” It’s probably smart to  move somewhere safer, like Ohio.

Hey you never know? All you need is a dollar and a dream. You’ve got to be in it to win it. And now, you could win a life changing jackpot and then buy various New York City landmarks. Perhaps you’ve seen some of the executions around town from this new campaign for Mega Millions? God, they’re depressing.

Miss Liberty is of course owned by the Federal government. So, if you did win and then decided that you just must have her—and the Feds for some reason agreed to sell her to you—what would you do with her? Keep her in place and open to the public, and create a nice steady revenue stream for yourself? Or flip her to the highest bidder? You could probably easily double-triple your money by selling her to some Russian oligarch. Anyway, with the current economic environment in the City (and the nation), I just found these come-ons to be utterly joyless.

Photos: ANIMALNewYork

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After squandering hundreds of thousands of dollars to terrorize New Yorkers with a low-flying photo shoot over Manhattan, the White House isn’t even going to use the new photos of Air Force One. So nobody is stuck using outdated publicity shots, we went ahead and Photoshopped a scene with the Statue of Liberty, as well as a handful of other patriotic or otherwise notable American landscapes in the gallery below.

Photo of the Statue of Liberty by JThomson