Since the release of The Secret Life Of Plants more than 40 years ago, various new age-rs, crack pots, empathetic people and occasional scientists have made a case for plants having their own form of consciousness. One of the best things about being a conscious living being is having sex, so some intrepid designers have a built a number of sex toys for plants to enjoy that sexual healing that may be missing from their lives.

The Plant Sex Consultancy, or PSX, certainly uses a lot of imaginative description (going as far as including statements from the plants that they “consult”), but it claims to be solving a legitimate problem. We Make Money Not Art explains how the devices can help:

Take the cyclamen, for example. The particular species of bees that pollinate the flower by shaking it with a specific frequency has gone extinct. PSX designed a vibrating pod with a sensor that gently grasps the flower. When triggered by an insect, the pod shakes with the exact frequency needed to release the pollen onto the insect. PSX has devised a total of six gadgets that meet the specific sexual needs of plants. Some flowers were outfitted with a vanity lace to prevent the spread of STDs, others were given an algae-containing dildo or a vibrator.

Damn man, even plants gotta worry about STDs. There is officially no such thing as free love. You can read an interview with PSX here. It may be nuts, but it’s not a joke.

(Photo: PSX Promo)