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Boyhood (2014) The same lead actor, filmedヾ(。◕ฺ∀◕ฺ)ノ for 12 years ヽ(^。^)丿wow –– a total of 39 days. From dir. Richard Linklater (Dazed And Confused, Waking Life, Before Sunrise), now there’s a phenomenal midly eventful steady bildungsroman that makes you notice every nuance of boy-II-man(ish)-hood, from dirt and bugs to the trauma of your first haircut via the overbearing authority […]

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The Dance of Reality (2013) El Topo Holy Mountain ☆ film-legend-bro☆ makes 1st feature in 23 years. (Read our interview: “One day I say, I need to make the most mystical scene, a scene that will be very heavy because you are dying, and your woman will ask you to allow her to send the water of faith through […]

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The Grand Budapest Hotel (2014) Wes Anderson’s newest film minces/gallops inside/around a hotel, its visitors (rich hags, writers), staff, proprietors, and one particular concierge whose professionalism is so divine and immaculate, it brings a tear to your eye. And then, the other eye. ALL PERFECT EVERYTHING: 5.0 out of 5.0      This is Wes Anderson’s most opulent […]

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The Wolf of Wall Street (2013) Scorsese ☆ ☆ ☆ ☆ superb muah true 2 brand muah. Started from the bottom now there’re Leo & Jonah stealing all the money because Wall Street. (Stealing is bad) Salesmanship. Riches. Intrigue. Vice. (Vice is bad) “Pharmacy on wings” !!!! (Drugs are very bad) Like fucking & stealing & drugs & brokerbros all sticking their […]

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Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013) It’s Battle Royale inside the Truman Show dome again but with more Big Brother (show not from book) cuz We Live In Public (all Hunger Games alumni in this one like aaaa FIGHT FIGHT) FIGHT!!! ACTION AND ADVENTURE-NESS: 2.5 out of 5.0   OMG I <3 PUZZLES How do we […]

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Hell Baby (2013) From the guys who brought you Reno 911 it’s Reno 911 w/Vatican priests sorta. Haunted house! Haunted uterus! “Bitches be trippin.” Demon baby. Ghost blow jobs. Po’ boys. Po’verty. Exorcismz. Eviscerationz. HAHAHAHA.   BLOoOOO0OO0oOD: 2.meh out of 5.0    Standard gory American comedy slapstick NOT GORY ENOUGH. Y U eviscerate/crucify “Dr.” Michael Ian Black and 1 scene […]

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ANIMAL loves minimalist icons, but before their various uses on the internet, this iconography served purely utilitarian purposes. The MTA uses tons of minimalist icons to show daily commuters where not to go, what not to do with the doors and where the rats and pesticide are. Let’s take a minute and admire them purely for their […]

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Pacific Rim (2013) BBBOOOOOOOOOOOMMM. Glurgh glurgh GLURGH GLURGH GLURGH GROOOOARGH!!!! Big monster, ugly. Much city fall down. CRASH. KABLOW, KAKAKABLOW. More, bigger monsters destroy questionable futuristic metropolises. Giant robots and shit, with people inside. Dramatic score. DRAMTIC-ER SCORE!!! BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM. Yey. SCIENCE: 1.5 out of 5 An inter-dimensional asshole rips open at the bottom […]

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