Even President Obama thinks that Sony “made a mistake” when the mega-corporation jumped to meet the bratty demands of a North Korean dictator and his minion hackers when it canceled the release of James Flacco/Seth Rogen comedy The Interview. While the best response would have been to release The Interview over the internet for free, POTUS has promised to exact revenge on North Korea with an ominous and vague threat, saying only: “We will respond proportionally and in a place and time and in a manner that we choose.”
Being in unchartered territory here, it’s hard to say what Obama has in mind. Since we’re all speculating about possible counter-cyberattacks anyway, ANIMAL is proud to present the “How Would You Cyberattack A North Korean Dictator?” Contest. We’re giving out real prizes, too: First place will win $250, second place will win $150, and third place will win a VHS copy of Team America: World Police signed by the ANIMAL staff.
Think of this as a Reddit writing prompt (or better yet, an actual Reddit thread) and you’re gunning for that Reddit Gold. Get creative with your submissions, and don’t worry about technical accuracy (this is all in jest, after all). Should we infect the government with a virus that turns every webpage into a flurry of puppies? Should we embed a Kim Jong-Un android that emits a love potion into all whom it encounters, thus imploding the tyrannical North Korean government from the inside? We dunno, you tell us!
Send your absurd ideas to email@example.com with subject line “Entry For Dictator Cyberattack Contest” on or by Tuesday, December 22 for consideration. Good luck and happy holidays.
(Image: Rhett Jones/ANIMALNewYork)