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Parties Banned at McKibbin Lofts:
Police Will “Shot” Them Down


March 14, 2013 | Marina Galperina

Is this the end of an era or a bluff by the management? The allegedly notorious McKibbin Lofts are known for three things: the Montrose and Morgan L stop proximity (ahem ahem ahem), the packed ‘n’ stacked quasi-mini-cubicle bed-“rooms” in inexplicable shapes and… the parties. Also, that one time the FBI raided McKibbin in 2011 because they thought Anonymous was operating out of one of the shanty-dorms. But mostly, the parties.

Until now, possibly, maybe, probably not. Last night, the residents of McKibbin Lofts were greeted with stern-sounding notices.

1. NO PARTIES ARE ALLOWED IN THE BUILDING

2. THE POLICE DEPARTMENT WILL BE CALLED AND WILL
SHOT DOWN THE PARTY

3. IF YOU ARE PLANNING TO HAVE A SMALL GATHERING,
PLEASE CONTACT OUR SECURITY PERSONEL, SO THEY KNOW
AHEAD OF TIME

The mythical rampant McKibbin Bohemia is quite exaggerated. Mostly, it’s just a very social environment with a touch of perpetual adolescence. The sprawling common loft spaces, the temporary renters from wherever-the-fuck-you’ve-never-been doing something-or-other-possibly-art-or-music-related, and yes, the regular merry shindigs are the few justifications for shelling out up to $900 a month for a room whose “walls” may or may not reach the ceiling.

Security personnel has been known to reprimand the residents on weeknights and particularly disruptive happenings. If any specific chaos instigated the notices, ANIMAL wasn’t able to find out… yet. I tried:

“Hi. I was just wondering what you meant by ‘small gathering?’ How many people?”
“That depends on what are you guys planning. What apartment are you in?”
“…I’m a reporter.”
“You have a nice day.” Click.

It would have been reasonable for the management to attempt to curb obnoxious bangers. It might have been understandable to issue a sobering-ish warnings against detectible rowdiness. But treating residents of legal age like kids and having to beg for permission to even have a “small gathering” is past Fuck You, Dad! territory. It’s weird.