‘Heidi Klum of Foot Models’ Terrorized After Boning the Help

Angel Rotger must have really pissed off his co-workers at 340 East 74th street when he started hooking up with foot model Christina Ambers, one of the building’s residents, because they all turned against the porter and the object of his affection, probably out of seething jealously that they weren’t getting to bone fancy foot models, after the relationship commenced, eventually leading to marriage. Read more »

Teen Blabbermouth Arrested For Bombing Upper East Side Starbucks

Inspired by the movie “Fight Club,” a teen arrested for the bombing of an Upper East Side Starbucks forgot the first rule: “You don’t talk about fight club.” Police arrested the teenager, Kyle Shaw, outside his home in Chelsea, charging him with arson, criminal possession of a weapon and criminal mischief for the May 25th blast that damaged a bench and shattered windows outside the coffee shop. With little evidence and few leads to go on, the police investigation was aided by the 17-year-old’s inability to stop talking. Read more »

Police Have No Idea Who Bombed Starbucks

More than two days after the predawn bombing of an Upper East Side Starbucks, investigators are no closer to figuring out who was responsible for the homemade explosive that damaged a wooden bench, shattered windows but fortunately did not injure anyone. Multiple witnesses claim they saw “two white youngsters, about 14 and 16 years old, running away from the scene,” which is the the best lead police have for now. Read more »

Something That Flys and Carries Passengers Crashed Into High Rise On the Upper East Side


Although many news outlets can’t seem to confirm whether its a small plane or a helicopter, one thing is for sure, a 60 story building at 524 east 72nd St. is on fire. NY1 is reporting that the 20th floor of the Belaire Building was hit and people are trapped. No word on whether or not it’s a terrorist attack but we will give a final tally of how many times Gothamist updates. Update: 17x
via Gothamist
Update: ABC news headline confirms it was a helicopter but can’t get someone to update ‘Plane Crash’ graphic on website.
Update: ABC news headline now says it was a plane crash but can’t get someone to update ‘Helicopter Crash’ graphic on website.
Update: ABC news headline finally match graphics and now we can properly assess tragedy: A small plane piloted by Yankees pitcher Cordy Lidle crashed into building on UES killing him, his passengers, and some residents.