Ostensibly to promote safe sex, but really to promote increased fucking, Durex—in collaboration with the Israel AIDS Task Force—recently erected (heh) a giant condom on the campus of Tel Aviv University during Students Day, an annual May event that draws 100,000 horny youngsters. Read more »
Fuck all if I understand this campaign—by acHe, a Spanish healthcare ad agency—for the La Condoneria condom shop in Barcelona. But I’ll give it an ad teacher’s shot. The “Rub-it” headline means, not to stroke your cock apparently, but to erase the just completed sexual encounter, thus the eraser shavings sculptures of women in fucking positions. You still with me? The ads seem to say, “condoms enable you to have meaningless, consequence-less sex. Anyway, note that (click gallery) not erased are a chocolate starfish and labia flaps in the doggie-style ad, and bush in the “little toad” and cowgirl executions. So, your warm sleazy memories remain, I guess. Compare these to other entries in the ANIMAL condom ad archive. |Images: AdsOfTheWorld|
This is not an especially creative condom commercial via McCann Paris for Durex (tagged: “condoms that generate desire”). The boinking balloon bunnies spot was much more memorable and desire-generating. But what is memorable about this is the youngness of the teens inspired to take a homework fuck break by the floating condom wrapper that serves as the spot’s lascivious linchpin. Just imagine the reaction if this underage ad porn made its way to American airways. My god, the thoughts it would put into our chaste teens’ minds. Jump for the SFW pre-coital scenes (plus two gay cops) scored with a cheesy Abba (knock-off?) tune. Read more »
Well, this is a red headpiece the Pope will never wear. Poster ad by Istanbul’s RPM Radar for O.K. brand “hot touch” condoms…”more pleasure with its warming effect…” From their website, translated by Google: ‘Hot Contact’ Christ is preparing to upgrade the fire! genital region of the heat through the heater contains the cream of the body temperature 3-4 degrees higher in the ignition, and is more than ready! Christ is preparing to do WHAT? Have I found a secret message forewarning the next Apocalypse? Anyway, I’m thinking it’s already hot enough down there in the ignition. Maybe Turkish women run a little colder than normal? Happy fucking Friday, fuckers.
|Image: adsoftheworld|
Where’s Pol Potshot? Kim Dong-Spill? Mahmoud Ahmadinejizz? Fidel Castrate? Bukkake Mussollini? Josef Semen? Bush? Well, we certainly love relaying to you all the bad condom ads on ANIMAL. We also love covering despot-themed advertising—especially the ever-popular Hitler. Despotvertising is one of the most lazy and hackneyed borrowed interest concepting methods employed by lazy, hack ad creatives the world over. And here, in these print executions (don’t say “executions!”) for German mail-order pharmacy Doc Morris, we have the inevitable despot/condom ad mashup. Of course, you could turn this idea on its head and make anti-condom ads by illustrating little spermy Gandhis, Dalai Lamas and copyranters. Jump for the rest of this tyrants with tails campaign via Grey Worldwide in Düsseldorf.
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Ambitious ads for Hansaplast long pleasure condoms, via TBWA Paris. Damn. Those studs lasted a long time; and, judging by the sharpness of the ladies’ tan lines, remained amazingly still for the duration of the passionless sexing. In fact it looks like the couples weren’t fucking at all, but rather posing for an X-rated beach photo shoot. Wannabe copywriters and art directors: this is a classic case of the idea kinda being there, but the execution being off. A better visualization of looong-lasting sex? How bout drawing a Sudoku puzzle on a woman’s lower back? More degrading to women, but less forced than these (personally, I just think of the Pope). And I have to point out…what’s with the man’s hand position on the woman on the right? Who’s put their hand there? Did he kill a sand fly and then fall asleep? |Images: pixelblog|
The internet has been oohing and cooing this week over this cute but naughty little web video for Durex featuring fuck bunnies made of condom balloons. It’s squeaky-clean fun, though us in America will of course never see the hairless-hares copulating on TV. Watch it, and witness animated ass-sniffing, doggying, 69ing, reverse cowgirling, train pulling…it’s got a little something for everyone, even a moment of humorous collapsed exhaustion. While I think it’s nice spot, it’s not an original idea—a fact none of the popular ad blogs pointed out this week. A year and a half ago, Ogilvy Red Card in Singapore produced human balloon animal print ads for Durex. In fact, even the condom balloon bunny isn’t an original ad thought. Now I’m pretty sure the responsible ad agency, Atlanta’s Fitzgerald & Co., was purposely riffing off of the Ogilvy print, and maybe even had the concept dictated to them by Durex. But this sort of cross-agency (bullshit buzzword alert) “ideation” happens all the time. One thing’s for certain: the bunnies beat the panty tarantula.
The animal kingdom has always been the most overused source for visual advertising puns. And of course here on ANIMAL, one of my main duties is to continuously report on animal usage in ads, whether it be abusive, inaccurate, insane, or achingly beautiful. Another of my obligations is to chronicle offbeat condom advertising, both traditional and flavored. Today, the two tasks meet—with absolutely ghastly effect. Check these ads for the Suan Yai Medical Center in Thailand promoting condom usage. Put you in the mood, don’t they? Me—condom or not—I may never insert my snake into a tarantula ever again. At least, I think it’s a tarantula. The female anatomy is so mysterious. Click below for a slithery example.
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