Minimalist Film Reviews: Elysium

August 14, 2013 | Marina Galperina

Elysium (2013)

Earth’s one FUCKED giant diseased crime ridden favela. Also, Matt Damon. Rich people R neverever sick cuz they have  .:☆*. magic sarcophagiiiii oOooOoo. :☆*:. in a mega-condo in the sky. Things are SO FUCKED. Orphan-to-gangsta-gone-straight goes up there all like POW ZAP ZAP KRRR for personal reasons but now to save the world… because bildungsroman THANKS OBAMA




So, basically, space is like that wall they’re building 2 keep the Mexicans from tooking er jerbs, er medical services and er beauuuutiful space mansions. #UniversalHealthcare #Immigration #GoodThings p straight forward wait what who said this was socialist propaganda? How can u not root for Matt Damon what is wrong w/you turn off Fox News UR SOUL IS A ASSHOLE


SCIFI WOW-UHH 4.5 out of 5.0


Neill Blomkamp what a champ, your sci fi game is some very believable understated & fine-tuned shit bro! Took all deez old tropes like Swiftian floating city immortality space colonies etc and put them together into a NEW GREAT THING that makes sense! And all the homies in Johannesburg-y future Los Angeles are listening to future-Grimes in the bio-hacker chop-shops.


DISTRICT 9-NESS: 2.5 out of 5.0


Did you see District 9? That guy made a movie called District 9. Good thing to talk about is District 9 and how much it is or isn’t like District 9, whether or not you remember anything District 9 after “apartheid metaphor.” Did you see District 9 tho?


PS LOVE STORY WAS STUPID THO maiden_in_distress.gif bullshitzzz


Minimalist review: Marina Galperina
Minimalist graphics: Nate Cepis
More: All Minimalist Film Reviews