A friend of ANIMAL, who we shall not name, recently visited Los Angeles and brought our crew some very special treats from a weed dispensary. For journalism!
It’s called Bhang Medicinal Chocolate and looks like chubby Kit Kat bars, but these confections come chock full of THC — precisely 30 mg per segment — and their tagline parodies M&M’s: “Gourmet chocolate that melts in your mind™.”
Since there’s nothing better than real time evaluations, we have decided to bravely ingest this cannabis milk chocolate and then review the effects shortly thereafter.
UPDATE: It tasted like weed. And milk chocolate. It’s a little over an hour later and its definitely kicking in. Andy decided that he and society at large would be better off if he left the office and did his review remotely, which we’re currently waiting for him to file. He’s currently walking around Hell’s Kitchen. “I’m trying to come down a bit,” he said over text message. “I’m putting notes together now.” We told him to go to Super Bowl Boulevard.
Very heavy, as expected. Onset is really quick after 45 minutes rendering your thoughts/reviews of weed products incoherent. Upwards moodswing with no down as of yet. I would be coughing quite dramatically if I had consumed this amount via smoking and instead of delicious treat. Good night.
So far, it’s pretty clean. I don’t feel sluggish at all. Usually edibles produce a very heavy high. I can also deal with fellow officemates no problem, although I will admit to having dark fantasies about watching the Bud Light ship sink, which I can see in plain view outside the window—our office is in Hell’s Kitchen. The only surprise is how damn thirsty I am. More water.
Editing photos is a lot more challenging. Like a hundred helicopters just flew over our building and I don’t even remember taking photos of them. Took me longer than usual to edit the photos, I was easily distracted by the slightest thing. There’s a tent behind our building playing Rush really loud. It feels like I did about five big bong hits. Walking around the office is pretty fun though. I feel more relaxed and functional than other highs. Definitely tripping on it though.
I had to leave because the prospect of talking to coworkers is freaking me out, and I’ve been walking around Hell’s Kitchen for past 30 minutes. All the Super Bowl tourists are here and my ears keep popping, but otherwise it’s been a good high. I’m definitely looking forward to going home and getting into bed though.
(Photos: Aymann Ismail/ANIMALNewYork)