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City Councilman Proposes Laughable Texting-While-Biking Bill

City Councilman Mark Treyger, who represents Brooklyn’s District 47, proposed a pointless bill during Wednesday’s transportation committee meeting that would ban cell phone use while bicycling. According to Streetsblog, no one was really into it: “Council Member Mark Treyger’s bill to ban handheld cell phone use while bicycling came up for a hearing today at […]

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Backdoor Pharmacist’s Guide To a Poisonous Valentine’s Day

The Feast of St. Valentine has been corrupted and stolen by Hallmark to sell cringeful punny greeting cards, chocolate corn syrup bombs, and upsold meals at restaurants you wouldn’t go to otherwise. Fuck off mass-produced mandatory affection; what I truly love is chemistry. Poison is an exotic chemical meant to hurt or kill. In the […]

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Learn The Principles Of Economics By Watching Seinfeld

Are you an economics student having trouble understanding some of the concepts? Or perhaps you’re a teacher searching for a new way to engage your students? Prepare by watching Seinfeld. The aptly named online archive project Yadayadayada Econ has found wisdom in the “show about nothing,” extracting clips from the show that illustrate economic concepts […]

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Have A Good Weekend: Ed Wood, Junglepussy And A Holy Mountain Party

Here are some art, film, music and other things happening in NYC so you can Have a Good Weekend. Drop your suggestions in the comments or to tips@animalnewyork.com. FRIDAY 77° LOW 62° Sustain-Release electronic music festival in the Catskills, with Ital, Blondes, Aurora Halal, Huerco S. and more. (6pm, $115, Catskills) The 5th Annual CCNY Self-Published Zine and […]

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A Levitating, Glitch-Spitting Speaker

Russian sound and technology artist ::vtol:: has created a spinning, levitating speaker which emits glitchy noise. The speaker spins fast or slow, LED lights flash and the noises it makes sound a lot like an old dial up modem. The speaker receives noise using bluetooth and the sound is created using “pure data.” The project Division By […]

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Everything Terrible About NYC Streets, All in One Map

Yesterday, the de Blasio administration released an interactive map that lets New Yorkers publicly complain about the state of our streets. Everything from jaywalking to “cyclist behavior” to “long distance to cross” is reportable, and the map is already loaded with grievances. “Use this interactive map to share your experiences with city streets,” reads the […]

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NYPD Responds to Pedestrian Death In the Most NYPD Way Possible

A 26-year-old woman died after she was struck by an ambulance and then hit by a car on West 96th Street in the wee hours of Sunday morning. The NYPD responded by issuing summonses… to pedestrians. According to CBS reporter Sonia Moghe, cops were at that location earlier today giving out tickets for jaywalking. The […]

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Anti-Subway Death Solution From the Anti-Muslim Artist

While Staten Island artist Scott LoBaido is getting press attention for designing a system that will allegedly prevent further subway deaths, we’ve got two reasons for you to hate it. Reason #1: It’s stupid. LoBaido’s “simple, common-sense concept” is for a long “safety rail ladder” to be installed beneath each subway platform in NYC. So, if […]

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NASA’s Space Food Is Extra Spicy

Remember the first time you tasted freeze-dried astronaut ice cream from the science museum gift shop, wondering… Where does space food come from? Why does it taste so funny? What is it like to eat while drifting through the cosmos? NASA’s Space Food Systems Laboratory (SFSL) is responsible for making sure that astronauts can munch on a […]

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